Have you been keeping score? I have.

It comes and goes, but lately, I've been keeping track of the effort and actions I've been making and comparing it to team members. Specifically my wife Jen over the last couple of weeks.

The number of times I've made breakfast/lunch/dinner. Cleaned the kitchen. Dropped the kids off at school. Diapers changed. Dog walks. The list goes on...

I'm not proud of this, because I know what it means. It means that I am quietly carrying resentment, and instead of explicitly asking for help I begin to subtly suggest that what others are doing isn't enough.

When I take a moment to separate the facts and emotions, I know this isn't true. In fact, if we really break things down I am sure that Jen has far more points on the board than I do...

The reality is, there is a part of each of us that the world, our partners, our team members simply doesn't see. But, when we don't acknowledge this truth our actions create an environment where the people we love begin to second guess their actions, waiting to be told what they did wrong or failed to follow through on.

So, let me ask you.

Where are you keeping score? What part of you does your family or team not see?

I would love to hear from you in the comments below. Permission to be human.